The issue of unwillingness to forgive those who have offended us is a very critical issue.
God has the attribute of forgiving those who offend Him. And who are they who offend God all the time? Point at yourself and say “I am one of them”. Have you said that? Good and that’s the truth.
We have often and often offended God. Many of us offend Him regularly either by omision or commission, consciously or unconsciously, knowingly or unknowingly. We do this one way or the other every day. But in spite of our numerous offences, God still wait patiently for us to change and become better people. Those who acknowledge their offences and go to Him and ask for forgiveness are forgiven immediately.
God is ever ready and willing to lovingly and kindly forgive us. He removes our sinful records and cancels them, not to be remembered or held against us any more. That is our loving, kind and ever merciful God.
Why then should a man say that he will never forgive certain offences committed against him? Why will a man say “Over my dead body will I forgive”?
Forgiveness is one of the commandments of God to us His children. Jesus Christ, speaking on the same issue of forgiveness said: ” … Neither will your heavenly Father forgive you if you forgive not those who offend you”.
Jesus also taught that our willingness and readiness to forgive those who offend us will be the condition under which we too can obtain forgiveness from God, our Heavenly Father.
Do you know that there are many parents who have disowned their children and some children who have disowned their own parents because of one offence or the other that was committed against them which they term as irreconcilable.
If misunderstandings cannot be settled amicably and peacefully and forgiveness obtained by offenders unconditionally here on earth among people, where else can it be settled? God does not settle quarrels in heaven. Heaven is for people who do not hold grudges against their fellow human beings.
Unforgiving spirit has no place in heaven, the place and abode of the loving and ever forgiving and merciful God.
All the”not seeing eye to eye” people carry about here against one another might continue in hell if not repented of and settled while they are still alive on earth.
The Holy Spirit is bringing this to our knowledge so that we can settle with and forgive one another.
There was Nigerian man who was privileged to visit and see hell in the 60s. He was there for eight hours and saw and recorded many things from there.
In his report, he said that he was shocked to hear his name in hell. Someone was calling his name from inside the burning flames of hell fire. When he looked at who it was that was calling his name from such a horrible place, he said that he was gripped with fear as he saw a woman he had known when she was still alive on earth.
According to this man, the tomb stone of the burial place of that woman had an epitaph written about her good works, Christian virtues, and great service to God and mankind during her time on earth.
He was therefore so shocked when he saw her in hell that he shouted “What are you doing in this place?”
He wanted to know why she is in hell and not in heaven where people had assumed she had gone to be with the Lord.
He narrated the life story of this woman. According to him, she was a devout and well known Christian woman. A Deaconess in her church.
He recalled that when that woman died, there was no doubt in the mind of everyone that she had gone to heaven to be with the Lord.
According to this man, the shock that gripped him made him to begin to wonder whether he, himself would be able to escape hell, if such a respected Christian woman could end up in hell fire, despite all those Christian qualities she exhibited and demonstrated during her life time.
So he summoned courage and asked her what she was doing in hell when everyone among the brethren had thought she had gone to heaven to be with the Lord.
The woman began to explain to him why she was sent to hell fire. She said that she had a misunderstanding with the choirmaster of her church. She did not reconcile with him nor forgive him because she had thought that as an older person, the choirmaster being younger than she, ought to have come and apologized to her.
According to her, that misunderstanding was not reconciled before she suddenly died. She explained that when she got to one of the gates, an angel stopped her from going further, but directed her to another gate.
She said that she was shocked and began to protest and explain to the angel that she deserved to proceed forward to the gate that leads to heaven. But the angel insisted that she was not qualified and went and brought the book of her records. In it, she was found okay in all other areas as a devout Christian, but the only dent, the only spot, the only stain, the only question mark in her record was her unreconciled misunderstanding with her church’s choirmaster.
For that reason, all the good works she had done on earth were nullified and labelled”Not to be remembered”. She was then directed to the gate that leads to hell fire and that was how a strong force swept her away and she was dumped into the burning flames of hell.
My friends, this is a true story. Is it not a fearful story? It makes me to quake with fear. Just one unreconciled misunderstanding with another brother, and all her good works, deeds and sacrifices and years of Christian living and commitment ended in the depths of hell.
Just imagine if that woman was allowed to go to heaven with that malice and grudge against that choirmaster, a fellow Christian brother, do you know if that brother eventually makes it to heaven, that soiled relationship would continue in heaven.
God does not want such a thing in heaven. Heaven is a place of peace, love, affection, humility, selflessness and unity in pure holiness.
There is no repentance after death. The Bible says, “As it is appointed unto men once to die, after that judgment”. Don’t mind those who have allowed false teachers to deceive them, teaching them about reincarnation and purgatory.
Many marriages have hit the rocks and scattered to pieces today just because of what they call “irreconcilable differences”. What makes a misunderstanding irreconcilable? You want to know? Just one word, pride.
No one wants to shift ground for the other person. No one wants to accept blame. So, the husband stands his ground. The wife also, uncompromisingly unyielding, stands her ground too. The deadlock remains unbroken and consequently, the marriage hits the rock and shatters to pieces and the couple goes their separate ways.
I pity many men and women who failed to manage their marriages but allowed them to collapse. I fear for such people. My fear is based on the teaching of the Lord Jesus Christ where He said: “… whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for fornication, causeth her to commit adultery and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced commiteth adultery” (Matthew 5:32).
Many marriages have hit the rock on some flimsy reasons and excuses; things that do not amount to anything. A husband could break the head of his wife for such minor thing as not putting enough salt, oil or meat in the soup.
A little matter like this that a simple word like “sorry” could have calmed frayed nerves, would be allowed to escalate and blown out of proportion and before you know it, the marriage parks up just like that.
I don’t know what people like this who could not manage their marriages would tell God on the day of reckoning.
Can two people who “put asunder what God has joined together” really be able to settle their perceived differences in heaven?
The Bible says that as long as these persons that have divorced remain alive, none of them should remarry. So while the partners still remain alive, no second marriage is allowed. It is a clear Bible injunction.
But, alas! Some people get into another marital relationship immediately they separate from their spouses.
My fear for such people is what will they tell God made their marriage to fail? It is a fearful thing to die without settling with a person we had misunderstanding with. We must forgive and reconcile and let the marriage continue, instead of putting it asunder because of selfishness and pride.
Are you reading this piece now and your marriage has failed and you have gone your separate ways and have even gone ahead to marry another person? This piece of work is not intended to condemn you or to castigate you. No. It is just to let us know so as to do the right thing in order not to work at cross purposes with our Heavenly Father.
Some people don’t really realise that one day there will be an occasion for them to appear before the Lord their God. For such people, I counsel, don’t live your life as if God doesn’t matter.
Don’t think that the way you choose to live your life is none of God’s business. That kind of thinking is born out of pride. On the contrary, the way you choose to live your life, (that applies to all of us), is God’s business.
If you notice that you have already defaulted, it means that you have some restitutions to make. You have some reconciliations to make and I suggest and counsel that you get up and do something now. Yes, now that you are still alive.
Personally, I don’t know how some of these celebrities would go about their own cases of failed marriages. Actors/actresses, musicians, sports men and women, including footballers, some of who, because of stardom, fame and wealth see themselves as too much for God to talk to, direct, instruct and guide.
The fact is that no matter how rich, famous and wealthy you become in life, a day is coming when none of them will matter any more. It is a day when eternity will be starring you in the face. It is a day when the Great Monarch of Zion, the King of kings, the one you despised and counted as irrelevant in your life and affairs while you lived here on earth. The one you never reckoned with. The one you never obeyed all your life. It is a day when He will summon you with all authority and majesty to appear before Him.
That day, there will be no hiding place for anyone because He will fill everywhere.
On that day too, Satan the one you paid heed to and served by your actions, would be far from you because he cannot stand before God. In fact, he would tell you that, indeed you acted foolishly to have allowed yourself to fall for his tricks.
He will tell God that you are like him because you too lived in disobedience to God just like he does. He will claim you as his ardent follower because you chose to serve him during your time on earth. He will earnestly demand that you should be sent to hell to continue to serve him there forever.
On that day, you will not need to talk because your records will speak. Every wrong you ever did and never repented of, will stand against you. How you could not keep your marriage but destroyed it out of pride and self-will. Or how you killed your spouse in order to be free to marry another person.
Your records will testify against you. How you were committing adultery and through it, you ruined your legal marriage. You will not need to speak; your well documented records will do the talking. All you will do is to acknowledge the veracity of what your records says.
If you are in this marriage dilemma, well, you are still alive and thank God for that. Your best bet is to take steps and reconcile and restitute. Remember, time is running out and anything can happen any moment. That is that on the issue of divorce and remarriage.
Perhaps, you are a sworn enemy of someone you had had a misunderstanding with and now you would not see eye to eye with him/her. You still have the opportunity to make haste and reconcile. All it takes is to swallow our pride.
Is that person your mother? Your father? Your son/daughter? A partner? Your pastor/church member? Your cold relationship with your perceived enemy will keep you and your Heavenly Father apart and there are many things you may not be able to accomplish in life as long as you allow that unforgiving spirit to dwell in you.
Ironically, that person you are refusing to forgive might even be the key that will unlock your divine destiny and greatness in life. So the devil wants to use this unforgiving habit to cage your divine destiny.
Let me remind you that Satan is the master destroyer of good things. He is a thief who goes about looking for who and what to steal, kill and destroy. He will use various methods to make you harden your heart against God so that you won’t forgive and reconcile and make peace.
Satan will give you many reasons why you should not forgive and reconcile. Be wise. He will send his human and spirit messengers to stand by you just to give you the wrong advice in order to finish you.
If you follow the advice of Satan’s messengers, they will make you become wretched physically, spiritually, emotionally, financially, materially and socially. Be wise.
Do not die as an unforgiving person. You need to humble yourself, be long-suffering, patient, empathetic, tolerant and always ready to let go and let live in the fear of God. Do it as sacrifice and honour to God. God cannot forget this act if you start doing it from today.
Check out for those you have and or have had issues with which have not been settled. Go to them; take someone or people you trust along and initiate reconciliation and see it through successfully.
It is for your own good that you do this. God will help you and bless you as you go about it. Amen!
Thank you for staying till the end. Please drop your comments, like, share and subscribe. God bless you.
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